Sam and Me and the Hard Pear tree

Another superb post from my friend Jami. I wrote about her little boy’s memorial in a previous post (Chanting Om for Baby Sam). Her writing is at once hard-hitting and tender and her inner strength and humility continues to inspire me. Brave too to be prepared to sit with her pain as she meditates. No-where to run to when it’s just you and your breath. I’m told that’s where the healing begins. I hope so, dear Jami.

crazybutterflylady

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The book is finished, and is currently being edited. It looks likely to be on the shelves on 1 August 2014. This is both tremendously fulfilling, and fucking terrifying. It covers the first year since you left Sam, and in some way it felt like a full stop. Like, phew, that chapter is complete. And I think that everyone who loves us also breathed a collective sigh of relief that our family had survived.

But now we must keep surviving, and every day is still a struggle without you, our baby boy. Our little brother. Our fifth family member. Every morning when we do group cuddles in bed you should be there. Oh, God, Sam, your absence will be felt. Always and forever.

We were sent a book called Always and Forever by someone. The boys love it, but not as much as I do. It’s about Fox and his friends…

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